A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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The morning of her 16th birthday, April's parents presented her with a young racehorse named Bolt. Bolt was energetic and strong the first two days, easily trotting around their 4 acre estate, but the following morning, when April went out to bring Bolt his breakfast, she found him leaning on his stable, head down, slowly rolling side to side. Upon seeing her newfound friend in distress, she promptly asked, "Are you okay Bolt? Why the long face?" Soon after, April realized that she had made a clever pun and grinned childishly. April's glory was short lived however, when Bolt suddenly collapsed due to an aortic aneurysm. Having spent most of their retirement on this racehorse, April's parents sold the ranch and moved into a retirement home, disgracing their daughter for not taking care of their steed. April, believing herself to be the culprit for Bolt's death, later committed suicide.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

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why wasn't the boy at his moms funeral? He killed his mom.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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What's the difference between a Rabbi and a Priest? One's a Jew, one's a Christian

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What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

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A guy walked into a store and bought a candy bar. Why? Because he wanted some chocolate.

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Q-whats green and has eyes. A-A frog are you stupid

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What did the man say to his wife. Hi

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Why did the cat die? Johnny put in the microwave.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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