Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

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Female Orgasms

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one, its a fairly easy task

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Honey, are you hearing things again? Nobody knocked on the door... Honey-are-you-hearing-things-again-nobody-knocked-on-the-door who? ...

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

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What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

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Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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what did Dr. Dre say? Nothing you idiots! Dr. Dre's dead!

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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