If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

The white guy did it!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

69.9

Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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