Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

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why was it sad that 3 men were crossing rail road tracks in a toyota and got hit by a train? they ruined the Toyota

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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Why did peter fall off his bike? Because Peter is a goldfish.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head on into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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What did the depressed girl say to her mother? I cut my wrists

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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