Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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What is Ash gray Battleship gray Black Blue-gray Cadet gray Charcoal Cool gray Davy's gray Payne's gray Gunmetal Silver Slate gray Taupe Purple taupe Medium taupe Rose quartz Taupe gray Timberwolf WhiteApple green Asparagus Bright green Cal Poly Chartreuse Dark olive green Dark spring green Dartmouth green Fern green Forest greenGreen Green-yellow Harlequin Honeydew Hunter green India green Islamic green Jungle green Lawn green LimePhthalo green Pigment green Pine green Pistachio Sea green Shamrock green Spring bud Spring green Teal Yellow-greenAlice blue Aqua Aquamarine Celeste Cerulean Cyan Electric blue Jungle green Magic mint MintAir Force blue Air superiority blue Alice blue Azure Baby blue Bleu de France Blue Blue-gray Bondi blue Brandeis blueAmethyst Byzantium Cerise Eggplant Fandango Fuchsia Heliotrope Indigo Lavender blush Lavender (floralblack gray silver white maroon red purple fuchsia green lime olive yellow navy blue teal aqua a List that you just spent 5 min reading

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Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't make sense Your cute

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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