why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Women's Rights

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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