Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

thumb_up thumb_down -101

Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

thumb_up thumb_down +170

where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +164

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops