what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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???????????? WTF?

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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