I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Women's rights.

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't make sense Your cute

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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a

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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