Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He was shot. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He was mentally disturbed. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

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A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

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What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

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i lyk 2 eet pup

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus. He died

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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Wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

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Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Not all black people are skilled at basketball

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world peace

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If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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