Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

refridgrator

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

what's the difference between a crocodile?

Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

An underage man walks into a bar. He then was shot and kicked out of the bar. An overage person found the body. What age is he? Normal Age

*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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