"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch

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Q: How do you stop a baby from crying? A: You hit it with brick.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

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What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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