Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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every knight i see an owl at window

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

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How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a cucumber? You can't gas a cucumber.

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Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

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What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Obamacare

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Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

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I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexic. Fcuk!

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a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

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Mitt Romney

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Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

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My penis is big... not.

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A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

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I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, but the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk!

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How do you kill a blonde? Choke her.

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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