- Anti Joke

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

knock knock whos there johovas witness O-0

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

1d

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

The chicken crossed the road.

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... Sigh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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