An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

You know what they call men who make kitchen jokes? Single.

What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

Once upon a time, The end.

Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

An Asian walks into a Chinese restaurant. Then he decides that he would prefer Mexican instead, and drives to a Taco Bell.

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...