A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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So a man is shopping on black Friday...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

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Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

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How are you this morning?

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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