if you read this you are gay

thumb_up thumb_down -174

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

385

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man goes to Church he meets God nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats plastic and phonie a phone

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why is the sky blue? Because when you look up at the sky, especially during the daytime, the sky is giving a bluish color.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

your mommy so gehto shes black

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops