Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

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purple pickles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

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What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

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Why don't bats have penises? They do. I tried. Menstruation.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops