An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Knock Knock Yes?

How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

Spinabifita

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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