What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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Whats sadder than a lost baby deer? Im too lazy too think of the rest of the joke.

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Most of these Anti-Jokes are Anti-Anti jokes, which makes them funny, if they were actually Anti-Jokes they wouldn't be funny at all.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

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what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

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Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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A man walks outside and walks back in. Why? Because it was raining purple unicorns and he felt the need to go back inside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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