How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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i just wrote this so hard

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Hi

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A cop

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When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

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boobs.

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Who lives on 2324 Elm St. River Grove Illinois? And Goes to East Leyden High School? The answer is Ricky Krajewski. He is 16 years old has brown hair and brown eyes. 5'11" 190lbs and 6.5 inch penis(when erect). social security # is 679-78-6283.

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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