If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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DESERT

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

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What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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There's my tractor.

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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