Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Knock knock. Who's there You are.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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finding out that when you had sex with that prostitute, you severely injured your urethra tube and you cannot create urine or spurm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not her.

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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Whats the difference between a 100 dead babies and a ferrari? One is an automobile and the other is a tragic reminder that SIDS is a serious and deadly problem.

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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I once heard what I consider the best joke ever: But I am not telling it to you, because this is a the anti-joke section. Moral: You better find the secret "real jokes section" because its there, yeeeeeess yeeeeeeeeees of coursehahahahaha!

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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