What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A penguin on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he f**king felt like it!

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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Woman's rights

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Aww, don't cry!

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In soviet russia, roses are violet

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

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What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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tee hee

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops