never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

When I walk in the rain, I get wet

Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

josh roberts got the d in geog

Nobody doesn't like Sarah Lee. There are no humans, at all, anywhere in the world, who do not like Sarah Lee. None. Not even one. They do not exist in reality. Everyone likes Sarah Lee. Everyone.

Gun Control

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

Xbox One

I saw a guy walking down the street like a black person. I just shook my head and smiled. He WAS black.

your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

The guy above me has a very nice joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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