So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

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That's what she didn't say

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

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whats hard, its not what you think a penis

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Why did the boy in a wheelchair cry? His mum just got shot in front of his eyes.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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