Did you hear about the cannibal who ate the Olympic record sprinter? He's in prison for first-degree murder & crimes against humanity.

What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

wanna hear a joke womens rights

you

knock knock who's th...AIDS.....

Whats worse than being white and in harlem on the 4th of july? Your schizophrenic father leaving you a voicemail detailing the politics of successful encounters with prostitutes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

God

Waiter. there's a fly in my soup! I apologize, I'll bring you a new one immediately.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

Who is the girl that has had sex with over 10 guys? Georgia Hidi

A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

What is the difference between a Mexican man and a bench? The Mexican man is a human being, thus being sentient and able to partake in social activities, such as receiving education, meeting people, getting a job, raising a family, and getting somewhere in life. The bench cannot do anything. It is inanimate and is meant to be sat on.

A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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