What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

What did the rat say to the snake when it ate it. Nothing for the rat is a rat and there for can not communicate through talk to the snake nor could it survive as the snake's digestive system disintegrated it in a matter of minutes.

What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

A lady with no legs walked..... never mind

Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

What do u call a black man in the middle of a crowd of white men? A rare sighting of a black man trying to go to colledge.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It can never be certain, as chickens are incapable of communicating.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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