Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

A women's opinion.

HAHA i just read a joke!!! and i liked it! :D to bad you dont know what page it was on... wanna know?... YOUR..... #1 LALALA

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's worse than the holocaust. I'm a Nazi so the holocaust wasn't actually that bad.

roses are red violets are blue i am bipolar so am i

What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

Get out of the way everybody, a group of elephants are tumbling down the mountain!

Why does Ron Weasley have friends? He does't. He's a ginger.

What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

Q: what did the man say to the woman when he wanted her to leave? A: please leave

Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

Whats funny about black people getting shot by whites We can steal our bikes back now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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