So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

I was going to tell a Holocaust joke, but I Jews not to. Anne Frankly, it's disrespectful. I'm sure you did Nazi that Hitlerious anti-joke coming.

Two tomatoes walk across the street and manage to get over safely. COME ON MUSTARD!

Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

What did God say when he mad another black guy? Danmit i burnt one again.

Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

why did the little boy fall over? he was hit in the face by a salmon.

A muslim, a jew, and a black man walk into a bar, the bartender asks what they would like to drink, after respnding, paying and receiving their drinks, they sit down to drink them. What a lovely scene of ethnic diversity

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

this is not an anti joke

What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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