What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

400 asian people walked in a bar

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

Hi

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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