A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -53

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

thumb_up thumb_down -169

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

sexual intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

thumb_up thumb_down +169

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops