Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

why did the man start living on the street? he lost his job, his wife left him, and had his identity stolen.

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

What do a turtle and a tree have in common? They both can fly except for the turtle............and the tree

What doesn't kill you makes you injured

Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

A whale's vagina

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two solely on her hair color, proceeds to kill them with a single shot glass. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Knock knock Who's there? Micheal Jordan. Micheal Jordan who? Your an idiot

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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