So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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whats black? a black man

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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You're mum is so fat, she has low self-esteem

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What did the autistic child say to the doctor? Nothing. His condition is so severe that he is mute and may never talk for the rest of his life.

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What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

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25

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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"I think your a hoe" "Don't worry, I know I am!" "You wanna F*** me?" "Hell Ya!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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