What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

Once upon a cross

Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

vaginas

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

The original "Chicken cross road" joke is a Anti joke in itself.

What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

I like my women the way I like my coffee: Without a penis.

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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