How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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"Hey Jeff, how are you?" "Yes."

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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i like turtals and kids

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What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

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why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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What happens when batman jumps off the top of a building? His fake wings fails and he dies upon impact of the ground.

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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What's the opposite of stupid? diputs

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercorse? I have aids

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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What is long and hard on a black man? First grade.

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops