If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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KKK

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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What is 8 times 4? 32

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so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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What did the black man do with the white mans stolen bike? He returned it after finding it outside a local shopping mall.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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stuarts mum

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

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The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

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What time is it? Refrigerator

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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