knock knock who's there police

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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What did the man say to his brother? Nothing, because he just died in a tragic car crash.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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hi

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how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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No. Yes.

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they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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I WILL DESTROY ISIS

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

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I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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A man walks into a bar what does he say Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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