Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

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Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

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Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

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There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? Because after twenty long years of monotonous nagging, he finally snapped.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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what's shaped like a tree? a tree

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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