There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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Curiosity killed the cat! No, the tire of a vehicle did.

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Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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