Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

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Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

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Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

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what do you call a black man named mike

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who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

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Knock, knock. Come in.......

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

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roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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