Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Barack Obama

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Women's Rights

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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