Then what's your favorite team little white guy?

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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What is brown and smells? Poop

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Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Penis

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Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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A van drives into a car.

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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NEVER

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Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

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Your brother is so ugly that sometimes he gets teased at schools and comes home crying.

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Hey I just met you,and this is crazy,please stand up,if you're the real slim shady.

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What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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