If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

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I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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9/11/01 walks into a bar

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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69

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Nickelback.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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The Economy

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A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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My friends are like trampolines I have none

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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