Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

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black chicken. kfc

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whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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