What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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knock knock? who's there the stubt double vampire that's going to kill you;0

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Orange is orange

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What did the captcha tell me to write? Tepsyto Dora

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what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops