When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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123457

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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