There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

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what do you call your mom? mom

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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Hey did you hear the one about the pizza oven? No.

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knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops