A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Hi

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whats worse than the holocost, nothing

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests Testicals

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What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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Sex vagina. lol.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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