A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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